My parents are too busy

they never have time.

                                                    My mother always has an excuse for anything

                                                    that is connected with learning about the eating disorder.

My mother said she finds                   

the parents meeting very painful-

did she think about the pain I

have to put up with every day?

                                                   My parents put so much pressure on me to recover

                                                   but they refused to be part of it. ...

                                                   My mother's depressed mood swings made me very anxious.

My father told my mother

to lose some weight.

                                                   When my mother is on the phone to her friends

                                                   she only talks about food and her weight.

I feel responsible for my brother's exams.

                                                    I feel very sorry for my mother,

                                                    she smiles only when she is drinking

                                                    and she does not even realise that I know it.

How can I recover when my father

does not miss one day in the gym.

                                                    I am not supposed to weigh myself

                                                    but the whole family does it on a

                                                    regular basis and talks about it.

My family never sits down at the dinner

table they prefer to watch television

instead of talking to me.

                                                    My father always works I hardly see him;

                                                    I think he thinks the business is more important than me.

My mother never says anything positive,

even if l have a good time she asks

'what's wrong?'

                                                    How can I give up drugs when

                                                    father is popping his pills - sedatives

                                                    inside him every day like Smarties,

                                                    because he can't handle the condition?

Mother said after she lost me through

the eating disorder her best friend is Prozac. ...

my parents want me to do my best

but they did never go to any parents meetings.

                                                    My mother always reminds me that

                                                    she cannot live until I recover -

                                                    that is the last pressure I need.

My partner often reminds me

that he does not like the way I look.

                                                    My husband blames the condition for everything.

                                                    I think he forgot I am person as well.

My parents said that they would only

pay for therapy when they see results

in my eating.

                                                    If I hear once more that they lost

                                                    the girl they had before, I will scream.

                                                    It makes me so sad that they cannot

                                                    see the real person.

I am all the time reminded that I am not the

girl I used to be - who is living in the past,

my parents or me?

                                                                  A doctor told me , that the electric shock treatment

                                                                 will bring me back on the right track ,

                                                                  my parents won't have to worry any more

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